This Madness
by the.black.window
Summary: Just a collection of one-shots, featuring human version of OCs about cars parody. Read at your own risk.


**Warning: This story is a prolog of a one-shot series or some kind, will be updated or left as it is. All the characters are OCs, I and my friend made up the names for them, similar to the actual cars' name. We don't own any recognizable content in this story. Human verse, definitely AU, and if you hadn't noticed, a parody. Please read at your own risk.**

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It was a usual peaceful and quiet day in C.A.R.S household. Only the first five minutes though, because when everyone had woken up then chaos would ensue. They usually took turns of who was going to start it first thing in the morning. Unconsciously, of course. If they did it on purpose then somebody ought to bring them to the nearest mental hospital. Or jail. Whichever came first and was closer.

The house leader was Fear Rare-y. Simply because he was the founder and true to his name, all of the house members feared him. He had a strong looking jaw line, straight nose, and slim but sturdy figure that made him looked competent enough to be a leader. He talked with precise pronunciation so it would be impossible to mishear him. Even though he talked fast enough, he still managed to make it clear. Did not sure how he did that.

His companion was A-stone Martin. He always wore the same stony expression wherever he was going, whatever he was looking at, whoever he was speaking to. He even laughed with a straight face. No one would ever forget that one time when he pointed out there was a snake behind the refrigerator, or when he picked up a pair of stray panties on the kitchen table. He did it all with no expression and nobody was sure if it was supposed to be frightening or painfully hilarious.

In the next room was occupied by two female members, Poorsche and iSuzu. Poorsche was pretty and in possession of flashy stuffs, but they all know it was second-rate. Third-rate even, because she was poor but desperate to keep up appearance. Being all contrary, iSuzu had all the first class gadgets. Always up-to-date with the newest technology out in the market. She'd always be spotted with her smartphone, tablet, or game device. Even though Poorsche usually was envious of her roommate, but they managed to make their friendship pretty functional.

Across from them, there were two beautiful males residing. The first was Mitsu Bishie, a natural pretty boy. Despite his feminine appearance, he was actually strong. Strong enough to have a hundred kilograms bench-press. They all wondered how his muscles never appeared with the way he worked in the gym, but never questioned it aloud. He was known to have a very short temper. The second was Mercedes Bents who had an odd hobby of crossdressing. It was a common occurrence for him to be mistaken as a girl. Unlike Mitsu Bishie who would lash out whenever he was called pretty, Mercedes Bents actually loved to be considered beautiful. He even dedicated few hours of his time to go to beauty salons to keep him aesthetically pleasing to look at. He was that fabulous.

And the last, but not least, were the rest two members in the house, Dai Hot-sue and Nii-san. They fought a lot, because Dai Hot-sue loved to pamper their cute members and Nii-san would feel overprotective about it. He swore he saw Dai Hot-sue tried to smuggle them into their room to do who-knows-what, and because Nii-san considered himself a brother of them all so he had to do his duties. But even though they usually disliked each other, but when it came to appreciating the younger ones' beauty, they could make a truce. For a little while. Because when Dai Hot-sue started to make a move, Nii-san would try to stop him and another fight arose.

Beside those eight members, there was another occupant called Lamp-board Genie. He was an AI, installed throughout the house to do maintenance and personal check. He was the one to ask if anyone wanted to find their missing coffee, books, barbells, wig, nail polish, batteries, porn magazines and a box of lollipops. He was pretty unique AI because he had split-personalities named Gallardo, Diablo, and Sesto. He was everywhere, so they all agreed to name him 'Genie'.

And it was Mercedes Bents who started the riot this morning.

"POORSCHEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" His scream would be heard until two blocks away. "HOW DARE YOU STEAL MY NEWEST HIGH-HEELED ANKLE BOOTS! IT'S LIMITED-EDITION I PAY FOR A HUNDRED DOLLARS! HOW DARE YOU TOUCH, LET ALONE WEAR, IT!"

"I did not steal your freaking boots, you fake-boobs!" Poorsche snapped angrily, slapping the hand pointed to her with an unnecessary force.

"I saw you uploaded it in your Instagram! Do you think I don't know what you're doing? If you want to look stylish, please afford it on your own!"

iSuzu didn't know if she should laugh or wince to the fact that Mercedes Bents didn't even react to the insult that he had fake boobs. But she turned to look at her roommate.

"…. Did you steal my tablet to upload it?"

"It's not only you who had the freaking-boots, moron! And I returned your tablet so I did not steal it, iSuzu. You're not helping!"

Nii-san was quickly rushing downstairs to calm the equally fuming now-red-headed male and beautiful girl.

"Mercedes Bents, you shouldn't talk to Poorsche like that. She didn't mean to steal and you know it." He turned to the girl and smile. "Poorsche, if you want that boots you can always tell me. Nii-san would be glad to buy you a present."

Mercedes Bents was about to protest, but his mouth only opened halfway when a figure suddenly flying down and crashed to the coffee table. All four heads turned to look who it was, but no one felt surprised when they saw Dai Hot-sue. On top of the stairs was Mitsu Bishie, fist upward and he was wearing a snarl that didn't suit his pretty face at all.

"That's for groping my ass."

Nii-san thought he would give his roommate another punch, but he was busy worrying Mitsu Bishie's innocence so he approached the younger boy. "Which ass did he grope, Mitsu Bishie? Lemme clean the trace for you."

And he was patting both Mitsu Bishie's buttocks fervently. A flash second after, he was joining Dai Hot-sue on the broken coffee table.

"They never learn," A-stone Martin stated a matter-of-factly as he sat on the empty chair beside the leader. Fear Rare-y himself only massaged his temple while letting out a tired sigh. He heard Lamp-board Genie spoke quietly. "Your coffee is ready, Sir."

Yes, Fear Rare-y thought sourly. He definitely needed that coffee.

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**A/N: Thanks for reading. ^^**


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